Play to Win

“Wake up nalayak”, yelled my mom. It was past 9am in morning. “Nalayak” means useless. Thats how Indian moms call their kids with affection.

It was a long night for me. I was playing a game called Paladins. Long story short it is a shooting game. And the night darkened with my losses. And you can be sure I am not going to sleep without winning a match.

First two matches were close match. Anyone could have won. Stroke of luck and presence of mind was the differentiator.

Those matches are the most fun. Then as I continued playing the matches became one sided. I started losing. I went from playing good to bad.

The more I played the more exhausted I became. And obsessed with winning too. You know what that is? A recipe for loosing.

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“Hurry up and get ready. You have to me to this exhibition today”, my mom told me with a sense of entitlement. Because thats what I promised before going to sleep.

I start to get ready and put myself in autopilot. My mind was still stuck on last night matches. The paradox of winning.

The more I tried, the harder it got. Winning with the intention of winning made me lose. But at the start I wanted to play. When I played I was closer to winning.

What made me lose was the force of winning. Obsession of not losing. And forgetting the essence of playing.

Its a hard nut to crack if you want to win. You cannot go after it directly. You have to get the essence of playing. Kill your expectations. You can only play and not expect its fruit of winning.

“Coming in a minute”, my mom said as I was waiting for her in the car. Now it’s time to drive. No more autopilot. Well at least not at the start of driving.

But before I drive away, what is the lesson here?

To win in a game you have to play it. Without the element of play your chances of losing increases.

Life is similar to a game. We will all do well if we play it.